Confessions of a Mama Drama Queen!
Last night, I unloaded my car full of shopping bags and groceries and made my way up what seemed to be a million stairs, unbalance and hoping to make it up the stairs without falling. I put away the groceries, dinner from earlier, and gifts I had purchased for Christmas. All the while feeling that even if for a brief moment, I closed my eyes, I would definitely fall to the floor passed out! I manage to finish up and make my way to my bedroom where I find laundry spread out on my bed, at least 3 loads. I then fold and put away what seems to be an endless pile of clothes, my hands unsteady and eyes unfocused! Finally, I shower. Slow motion seems to be the speed I am going (at least in my head). I am barely able to hold myself up, my bones feel heavy, and I am now ready to sleep. I pass out!
I am awaked in the middle of the night by a horrible nightmare that I can not shake...
Reminiscent of my younger (pre-kids) days, I felt completely drunk. The difference is this time, there was no alcohol involved. It was just plain exhaustion. It seems life eventually catches up to us all...
On the brighter-side, at least I didn't wake up with a hang-over.
Showing posts with label moms. Show all posts
Showing posts with label moms. Show all posts
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Confessions
Confessions of a Mama Drama Queen!
"They" say when a woman is pregnant, her brain actually shrinks 10%. The brain will go back to normal 6 months after giving birth. Between you and me, it's been almost 3 years, and I still don't think I've made a full recovery!
"They" say when a woman is pregnant, her brain actually shrinks 10%. The brain will go back to normal 6 months after giving birth. Between you and me, it's been almost 3 years, and I still don't think I've made a full recovery!
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Confessions
As part of my blog I will now start a new type of post:
Confessions of Mama Drama Queen!
These posts will be titled:
"Confessions"
The posts will most likely be short (some of the time), and to the point.
Confession:
I can't wait until the clock strikes 7 and the girls are down! I am so exhausted I should probably go to sleep when they do, but I don't. I sit. I watch mindless TV until I pry myself up to bed!
Confessions of Mama Drama Queen!
These posts will be titled:
"Confessions"
The posts will most likely be short (some of the time), and to the point.
Confession:
I can't wait until the clock strikes 7 and the girls are down! I am so exhausted I should probably go to sleep when they do, but I don't. I sit. I watch mindless TV until I pry myself up to bed!
Monday, August 31, 2009
I am a Contradiction...
Motherhood consists of a series of inconsistencies.
As a mother I contradict myself at every turn.
-It's too early for sugar, yet I have my morning coffee with something sweet.
-I yell out at our kids to "stop yelling".
-While applying my make-up, my girls are always asking to wear some and I always say, "you are beautiful with out make-up, you don’t ever need to wear any"- as I'm trying to make myself up!
-“Don’t run in the house, you’re going to slip and break your head”. What makes running outside any safer? In fact it seems the injury would probably be worse outside.
-I often catch myself saying "will you stop being silly". HELLO they are KIDS, which means they are going to act silly!
Here’s my vice, which I can’t help and don’t think I’ll ever change. I tell them (well, at least Lexi): “You need to sleep in your bed all night”. I secretly love when they come to cuddle with me and I won't turn them away.
I open my eyes, it feels like I just closed them, but in reality it’s the twilight of the night. There is a dark and quiet calmness that has settled in the house. I feel a presence around that awakens me from the stillness of my slumber. I slowly open my eyes. My little girl, with her eyes barely opened- talking in tongues, tells me “mommy can I sleep with you?” I know I should take her little hand, walk her back to her bed, give her a gentle kiss on the forehead and tell her everything is fine, you should go to sleep now-I love you. Instead, I pick her up, lay her next to me, give her a gentle kiss on the cheek and tell her, everything is fine, you should go to sleep now-I love you.
I’m sure no matter how much effort is put forth, I know it will happen on many more occasions. It seems for me, motherhood is a series contradictions and cover-ups that at least for now seem to be in the best interest of my children…
As a mother I contradict myself at every turn.
-It's too early for sugar, yet I have my morning coffee with something sweet.
-I yell out at our kids to "stop yelling".
-While applying my make-up, my girls are always asking to wear some and I always say, "you are beautiful with out make-up, you don’t ever need to wear any"- as I'm trying to make myself up!
-“Don’t run in the house, you’re going to slip and break your head”. What makes running outside any safer? In fact it seems the injury would probably be worse outside.
-I often catch myself saying "will you stop being silly". HELLO they are KIDS, which means they are going to act silly!
Here’s my vice, which I can’t help and don’t think I’ll ever change. I tell them (well, at least Lexi): “You need to sleep in your bed all night”. I secretly love when they come to cuddle with me and I won't turn them away.
I open my eyes, it feels like I just closed them, but in reality it’s the twilight of the night. There is a dark and quiet calmness that has settled in the house. I feel a presence around that awakens me from the stillness of my slumber. I slowly open my eyes. My little girl, with her eyes barely opened- talking in tongues, tells me “mommy can I sleep with you?” I know I should take her little hand, walk her back to her bed, give her a gentle kiss on the forehead and tell her everything is fine, you should go to sleep now-I love you. Instead, I pick her up, lay her next to me, give her a gentle kiss on the cheek and tell her, everything is fine, you should go to sleep now-I love you.
I’m sure no matter how much effort is put forth, I know it will happen on many more occasions. It seems for me, motherhood is a series contradictions and cover-ups that at least for now seem to be in the best interest of my children…
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
Working Out
My at home regimen includes the following, which are performed throughout the day:
Dishes- works out my arms
Picking up things/toys/kids, etc... off the floor- abs and arms
Going over the gate(hurdles) - legs, and abs
Lifting the kids over the gate- arms, back
Going up and down the stairs for various tasks- cardio
These are just few of many "exercises" I do within my daily routine...
...I think I should be a lot thinner!
Dishes- works out my arms
Picking up things/toys/kids, etc... off the floor- abs and arms
Going over the gate(hurdles) - legs, and abs
Lifting the kids over the gate- arms, back
Going up and down the stairs for various tasks- cardio
These are just few of many "exercises" I do within my daily routine...
...I think I should be a lot thinner!
Monday, June 15, 2009
Is Giving up, Giving in?
I am asked a question by my daughter and my answer is no. The phone rings, and it is a call I actually need to take. The twins decide they need me right away, and Lex decides she is going to ask me the same question once again- all the while I am trying to have an important conversation on the phone.
Moving about the house does not help when I have a blurred shadow of four, which seems to be following me. I try my hardest to continue the conversation, get the babies what they need, and tell Lex once again the answer is, no!
My shadow which contains the haze of four little impressions seems to have not yet disappeared. I once again get the babies what they need, I am again asked the same question by Lex, and the answer "FINE!" seemed to jump off my tongue in a fit of distress for one minute of peaceful interaction between me and the person on the other end of the phone line.
Is giving up, giving in? Sometimes, but once in a while I need that brief moment that comes when I do!
Moving about the house does not help when I have a blurred shadow of four, which seems to be following me. I try my hardest to continue the conversation, get the babies what they need, and tell Lex once again the answer is, no!
My shadow which contains the haze of four little impressions seems to have not yet disappeared. I once again get the babies what they need, I am again asked the same question by Lex, and the answer "FINE!" seemed to jump off my tongue in a fit of distress for one minute of peaceful interaction between me and the person on the other end of the phone line.
Is giving up, giving in? Sometimes, but once in a while I need that brief moment that comes when I do!
Monday, June 8, 2009
Summer
My alarm clock has been turned off-it is now officially summer. The scheduled chaos of school days has come to a temporary halt. We now wake up to the babies yelling "upppppppa" or Lex crawling in to bed for some morning cuddles. Scheduled activities for the summer don't begin until 10:00am.
I'm not rushing around all day like the crazed Taxi driver that moms usually become- but now the girls are home, together, the entire day!
Relaxing still seems impossible. Quiet only comes in small doses, between the screams of the girls bickering with one another. We look forward to summer vacation, once it's upon us, I find myself looking forward to school starting, again.
I get a break from driving around all day-only to break up the constant bickering between siblings. Figures!
I'm not rushing around all day like the crazed Taxi driver that moms usually become- but now the girls are home, together, the entire day!
Relaxing still seems impossible. Quiet only comes in small doses, between the screams of the girls bickering with one another. We look forward to summer vacation, once it's upon us, I find myself looking forward to school starting, again.
I get a break from driving around all day-only to break up the constant bickering between siblings. Figures!
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Wanting to fly
My daughter has a dream to soar above, flutter among the flowers, glide along the clouds, and reach for the stars...
From the corner of my eyes I can see my 3 year old up to something. I glance over to see her with a balloon tied around her waist. She gets on her tippy toes, she jumps up! To her disappointment, she falls back down on her feet. She then decides she must gather the remaining balloons in the house-because that's what's going to do it, she needs more! She pleads with her sisters to let her have their balloons, "please I need them". She now has them all. She gets up once again on the tip of her toes, jumps up, and realizes-even with all the balloons, she still can't fly!
For over a year now, my daughter, Alexandra has been very saddened by the fact that she cannot fly. She is continuously asking me why she can't fly and when she is going to be able to fly. Her references include Thumbelina and TinkerBell.
Alexandra thought she had found a loop-hole to her whole flying dilemma! She didn't actually need wings to fly!!!
I took the older girls to see UP! this weekend. In the movie an old man uses balloons to lift his house up...At one point a little boys that has embarked on this journey with the old man uses the balloons to fly away. He young boy ties the balloons to his waist and flies off...
From the corner of my eyes I can see my 3 year old up to something. I glance over to see her with a balloon tied around her waist. She gets on her tippy toes, she jumps up! To her disappointment, she falls back down on her feet. She then decides she must gather the remaining balloons in the house-because that's what's going to do it, she needs more! She pleads with her sisters to let her have their balloons, "please I need them". She now has them all. She gets up once again on the tip of her toes, jumps up, and realizes-even with all the balloons, she still can't fly!
For over a year now, my daughter, Alexandra has been very saddened by the fact that she cannot fly. She is continuously asking me why she can't fly and when she is going to be able to fly. Her references include Thumbelina and TinkerBell.
Alexandra thought she had found a loop-hole to her whole flying dilemma! She didn't actually need wings to fly!!!
I took the older girls to see UP! this weekend. In the movie an old man uses balloons to lift his house up...At one point a little boys that has embarked on this journey with the old man uses the balloons to fly away. He young boy ties the balloons to his waist and flies off...
Thursday, May 7, 2009
I, Chef
It's the FIZZ!
Most children love soda because of the fizziness. Here's my secret to give my kids soda:
3/4 cup Juice
1/4 cup Sparkling Water
The carbonation from the water turns any juice into "soda". So my kids have- "SODA JUICE".
Most children love soda because of the fizziness. Here's my secret to give my kids soda:
3/4 cup Juice
1/4 cup Sparkling Water
The carbonation from the water turns any juice into "soda". So my kids have- "SODA JUICE".
Friday, May 1, 2009
I, "Gumby"
I have become stretched in ways I never thought humanly possible. Pulled in every direction, with each child pulling a limb in opposing ways. My head, all the time, spinning around them like a carousel. "Mom" is the song that plays in the background-over and over, again, from dawn to dusk.
Once the kids have gone to sleep and I'm done for the day, an amazing thing happens. I actually reshape back, into something recognizable and stable, sustained only by this brief period of quiet and stillness.
6 hours later it all begins again...
Once the kids have gone to sleep and I'm done for the day, an amazing thing happens. I actually reshape back, into something recognizable and stable, sustained only by this brief period of quiet and stillness.
6 hours later it all begins again...
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